Well I certainly enjoyed my time as Chief Steward on the Inverness to Aberdeen Line, However like all that had gone before me, Eventually the dust and grime from the horrendous Diesel Multiple Units got the better of me ... And I applied for, and was accepted for the Position of Chief Steward Relief.
As a Relief Chief Steward, I stepped in to cover for the regular guys when they either had a day off or went on holiday etc.
This of course meant I had to work various routes and services, in the Inverness Rail Catering network ...Including Buffet cars, Griddle Cars and full restaurant cars.
My introduction into the Role of Chief Steward was to take place on the "Griddle car" Running between Inverness and Edinburgh.
The Inverness catering Depot had Two Griddle cars (Possibly the last to run on BR Lines) One to Edinburgh and one to Glasgow.
The Griddle car was an in between version of a Restaurant car and Buffet car. In that it did serve full Griddle meals (All day Grill- Fish and Chips - Steak and Chips etc.)
The Vehicle was divided into four distinct areas.
The seating area for diners (22 seats).
The buffet counter.
The kitchen area with hot plates, deep fryers and grill.
The self contained Bar area complete with Quarter circle bar, small tables and first class Seating.
Well of course it wasn't my First time on a Griddle car, But it was my first time in charge of one, and of course the other two crew members.
On this occasion ... Well I thought I was fortunate, As I had with me to two regular Stewards that normally worked this route
Old Jeanie :- Stewardess of unknown age, but perhaps around late fifties.Old Spud :- Never did get to know his correct name, Spud looked around seventy but I dare say he was in his sixties.
On my arrival at the Train ...Both Spud and Jean seemed to be busy, Cleaning shelves and general tiding up. "We have not had time to get the Stores" said Jean ...Looking hopefully at ME.
Ian trekked down to the store and pushed the heavy loaded trolley up to the Train.
My timing was terrible ...I arrived at the Griddle car Just as Spud and Jean decided to go and change into their uniforms, So had to man handle all the stores on board ...Phew ..at this rate I would be knackered before we got out of the Station.
On departure Spud and Jean seemed to know exactly what to do (Made my job easier ...I thought).
Jean slotted inbehind the Small bar and started serving some regular customers.
Spud on the otherhand was behind the Buffet counter serving a few travellers and keeping his eyes open for anyone wanting a meal at the Tables.
I of course (the only job left) started pre-cooking various items ready for the first meals to be served.
Some twenty minute from Inverness we suddenly had a Few people in looking for Meals (mostly breakfast).
Now, cooking on a moving train is not as hard as it looks, Stewards soon get used to moving their body with the swing of the carriage, However there is one small point.
The eggs were fried on the Hotplate. Sounds simple ...put a little cooking oil on the hotplate ..Crack an egg ..and it will fry.
However if you try cracking the egg when the train corners ... Well, you end up with a little yellow yolk with a two foot streamer of eggwhite trailing behind it.. (a bit like a shooting star)
Having already wasted 3 eggs, I realised that Spud was have a quiet giggle at my misfortune. "Never mind" he said .. "We can have them for our breakfast"
After the Initial rush of Customers had been served thing quietened down a little. Spud was in the Buffet ...Coughing and Sneezing.
"Christ! I cannot shift this Cold ..IAN ...I'll need a wee drop of medicine."
Now I was under the Impression that he was talking about a sip of Nightnurse or something ...So said "OK"
Spud toddled off the BAR grabbed a Minature Whisky and proceeded to make himself a Hot Toddy (Whisky hot water and sugar).... Now perhaps Toddy isn't all it is cracked up to be ... Spud was on his fourth That I knew of and he still didn't sound any better.
It was fairly quiet so I headed to the Bar, The main idea was to tell Jean not to give Spud any more whisky.
When I opened the sliding door, Jean was standing behind the Counter with a large whisky and water in her hand.
"OH ...Its OK Ian" ...Said Jeanie ..."This man bought me a Drink" (pointing over to around 6 guys sitting in the Bar)
By the time we were reaching Edinburgh ...The FERRET was not a happy bunny ...Spud was swallowing his Toddy in one go, and by the Sound of Jeans voice she was well oiled as well.
RIGHT ..I though ...Some serious talking when we reach Edinburgh.
Having closed up the Catering Vehicle and arrived at Edinburgh both Jean and Spud appeared back in the Griddle wearing their Coats.
SPUD :- "I'm just off to the Bookies ...Can I put a bet on for you Ian?"
Jeanie :- "I'm away up to the Shops, I saw this nice suit for the Grandson ...Can I get you anything ..IAN."
Having assured them I neither wanted a bet on the Horses nor childrens clothes they left ... I was left to get the Bloody Stores again ...And clean up.
A couple of minutes before our departure, to return to Inverness Spud And Jean appeared ....SPUD must have found the only Bookies in Britain that sold booze, And Jeanie certainly hadn't spent all her time in the Clothes shop.
However like True professionals, they swung into their roles as soon as the train left the Station.
Jeanie was having a great time with the Bar customers, and Spud was laughing and joking with people at the Food counter ..The Toddies continued ...But at least he stopped coughing over everything.
30 minutes prior to arrival in Inverness the catering vehicle closed and I started to tally up the Paperwork and Takings.
Steward and Chief Stewards rely on tips from satisfied customers to raise their wages to a reasonable level. I knew we had taken in around £20 Tips at the Dining area ... add this to the various other bits and pieces and it should have been a good day.
NO CHANCE ...When I tallied up the cash there was only £2 left over.
You could see the hostility in Spud and Jeans faces, as we re- counted the stock, Hopefully we would find a mistake ...But no they were spot on.
On our arrival back at Inverness, Spud and Jean shot off to the Station bar (for a quick drink after work ...HUH?).
I was mulling around the Cafeteria (fuming Mad) when I got a call from Mr. Pollock (The Station catering Manager)
In Mr. Pollocks office he asked me what was Wrong .. I told him about the Money being short ..
"To be honest ..I'm not concerned about the Tips" .. he said, " How did you get on with the CREW."
Not wanting to drop Spud or Jean in it ..I just replied "OK."
"Remember Son" ..Said Mr. Pollock .. "YOU wear the Chief Stewards Jacket ... You decide how the Catering runs ..And I'll back you should you need it."
The Following Morning, I arrived at the Train early (Before Spud of Jean had arrived in the Station.
When they eventually arrived, "Right you two ...Down and get the Stores!"
"Eh ..We need to set up the Shelves" ...They replied.
"Done it! ...Go get the stores."
Ten minutes later they returned, I made myself busy sorting out the Dining tables while they humped all the good on board.
By this time Spud was Wheezing and clutching his chest.
"Cough!.. Cough ..Dammed cold it right into my lungs!" ..he said.
"If your not fit for the Job.. SPUD ...Go see Mr. Pollock and tell him to send up the Spare man to take your Place."
A look of Horror came over his face ..."NO.. I'll be alright ...Ian"
"You better be .. Cause you'll get no friggin medicine on this Trip"..I said.
Jean by this time had changed into her uniform and was heading for the BAR.
"HOI JEAN" ... She stopped in her tracks ..."Where are you going?"
"To the BAR" ..she said.
"NOPE ..Your on the Cooking today ...I'm doing the BAR."
"But I always do the Bar ...I'm the Bar Stewardess" ..she stammered.
NO ..Your a Stewardess and you'll either do what your told ...OR ..You'll get the Hell off my catering vehicle ..Please yourself."
Well no need to Bore you with the Details on this Journey, Suffice to say it became pretty lonely for me (nobody talking to me) But Spud and Jean worked their little socks off.
Come the end of the Trip ...I tallied up the Cash ..."Mm Tips are good ..Over £30 left" I said.
"However as you two got pissed as Newts yesterday ...and drank my share ...You can have a fiver each ..I'll have the rest."
I worked many time with this and other Crews in my career as Relief Chief Steward, But because of this occasion, It became common Knowledge that I was a hard but fair taskmaster, And although some tried to pull the Wool over my eyes, it seldom worked.
A Young ferret had learnt a very important lesson in life, When YOU are in charge of Others ...You can't always be popular.
