There are lots of logistics to work out during a wedding, and emotions are running high, so the emotionally intelligent thing to do is be prepared.
A suggested order for toasting during the Rehearsal Dinner is: The best man toasts the bride; the bride toasts the groom; the groom toasts the bride's mother; the bride's father toasts the groom's parents.
During the Reception, the order might be: The best man toasts the bride and groom; the groom toasts the bride and her family; the (two) father(s) toast the bride and groom; the bride and groom toast each other.
1. Keep the toast 3-5 minutes long and maintain eye contact with the bride and groom as you deliver it.
2. Stand and deliver! Sit down if it's for you. Before you begin, announce your relationship to the bride and groom. Everyone may not know.
3. Use personal anecdotes; how the bride and groom met is always popular. Don't give a long string of characteristics. Rather choose a few adjectives, hitting the high points, i.e., she's lovely, vivacious and kind.
4. Use tasteful humor and don't do "in" jokes that only a few will get. You want to include, not exclude. And stay PG-rated. There may be children there, and also it's your responsibility to make sure on this occasion you offend absolutely no one.
5. End on a serious note. Finish with a wish, a blessing, cheers! or congratulations. "To the bride and groom" always works.
6. Practice your toast a lot beforehand. It's not a good time to "wing it" especially if you plan to be imbiding beforehand.
7. Make sure all the glasses are full before you begin.
8. Do NOT mention past girlfriends, past marriage, or past relationships. That's what the stag party is for.
9. And don't end with something negative which may slip into your mind if you aren't prepared like, "And I hope theirs doesn't end in divorce like mine did."
10. Can't think of what to say? There are a host of services that will write it for you - ranging in price from $19 to $119. Here are three:
http://www.blissweddings.com ;
http://www.wedding-speeches.org ; and
http://www.theperfecttoast.com .
Emotional intelligence coaching, business programs, EQ Alive! coaching school, marketing for coaches, EQ products for licensing. Nothing is more broadly applicable or beneficial to your life than emotional intelligence. Let me start teaching you today. Call 210-496-0678 or mailto:sdunn@ susandunn.cc to schedule a sample session.
