The CRYPT Mag

A Tale of Olde

By Baz Cann

In days of olde when deeds and valour were the measured thing, The shows were filled with jesters, and minstrels whom wouldst sing, Archery contests, Pikemanship, and medieval joust, Wouldst win the heart of maidens, and quick the losers oust !

Those of the disposition wouldst depart upon crusades, And those with less enthusiasm were taken as aides, Once in a while a Knight announced, "I will take on a Dragon !", "Spam in the tin, and piping hot!" his friends wouldst sure be raggin'

Now Dragons be a fearful thing, they have a breath of fire, And fresh made flame grilled whoppers be their only heart's desire, Much worse than any vermin, and more dangerous than most, But useful when at breakfast time to help prepare the toast.

All manner of these brave men set apart to slay such beast, The Dragons held a barbeque, for several friends at least, A very warm reception was the order of the day, As tins of cooked meat on their steeds made off the other way !

But alas the Dragons did despair, all didn't go their way, A right small chap who was called George came for a pleasant stay, "I've got yon Dragon problem licked !" he one day softly said, "And now I'll set upon it, once I get out of bed !"

The strangest sight you ever saw was George that very day, Wearing a suit of white material, not in usual array, "Here goes another breakfast bap, to be burnt to a crisp" Quoted the Court Physician, with a noticable lisp.

Asbestos suits of underwear had Dragons quite perplexed, Although they tried their best to scorch, they only got right vexed, For flame-proof Knights in pyjamas, they'd never seen before, Who dampened them with fire buckets, directly at their door !