The Domino Column

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All things bright and beautiful
All Creatures great and small                         
All things wise and wonderful                       
The lord GOD made them All                        
                                                                  
                                                                   
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Hi Pups.

Bet your wondering why the Resident Dalmation is sitting here singing HYMNS?

Well look at the Words "All Creatures Great and Small" and that God made them all.

So why are you lot going around the Country and killing everything in sight?

Look maybe Domino isn't the Brightest Dog in the World, But even I know that mass slaughter of innocent "Beasties" is a bad thing.

Just incase you still think ...The Doggie is off his Trolley, I'm talking about this "Foot & Mouth". Now as I understand it, From the Papers and watching the Telly. The Little Piggies were the first ones to gt this Foot & Mouth, And the reason they got it was one of you gave them bad food (Pig Swill).

Now Correct me if I'm wrong here ...Pig Swill is made up of food not fit for Human Consumption ....So why feed it to the little Piggies? ... Anyway you lot gave the Piggies Poisonious food and they caught this Foot & Mouth, Did you say Sorry? ... Not You start killing everything in sight ...Cows, Sheepies even little Chickens ...Nothing is safe ...Well apart from Humans.

Now lets get our facts straight here. Foot & Mouth won't kill anything ...All these wee beastie will get better. OK for a while they get blisters in their mouths and can talk properly, also they tend to fall over a lot.

Old Grumbleguts (My Master) is just like that ... About three times a week ...After he drinks that bottles of Brown Stuff. So what ... They don't send in the Army and slaughter half of Glasgow just because my master can talk and falls over.

So why the slaughter? I think its your way of making sure the Piggies don't tell their story to the National Newspapers. Yep! It a cover up job. Still I had a look at the SUN the other day and I'm pretty sure that their was a Picture of a Piggie in it.

Of course he was in Disguise and used a false name "Willie Hog or Haig" Or something. Any way he was going on about winning this "Erection" ...So I reckon he's going to Stuff you lot with it for killing all his mates.

So OK you Humans decide to have a cover up ... So people don't know your giving Piggies Poisoned food and embark upon this mass murder, But wait a minute here! Your not content with just killing the Animals.

NO! you shoot them .... Leave them lying in the Fields for a couple of weeks, Throw them into big Trucks for a couple of days, Bury them in big holes in the Ground ... Then 3 weeks later you dig them up and Burn them.

Jeez! We didn't poison you ... What other species could be so bluddy UN-HUMAN ....None only you Humans can be UN-Human.

On a slightly less serious note ...To finish off. One of our Neighbours has a little Boy ... About 3 years old.

They called him MARK.

PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE ...Don't call your children Mark.

At dinner time she goes out and shout for him

MARK! ......... MARK! ............ MARK!

I've spent the last 2 month looking for a dog with a Hare Lip.

Goodness sake ....be more conciderate.

Love

Domino (resident Dogs Body)


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