SPEEDING

by Elizabeth Green

This bloke gets pulled over by the police.

Copper: Can I see your licence sir?
Driver: Ain't got a licence I lost it for drunk driving.
Copper: This your car sir?
Driver: No I stole it this morning
Copper: Can I see the logbook?
Driver: It's in the glovebox under me gun.
Copper: Gun!
Driver: Yeah the one I used to shoot this car's owner.
Copper: Shoot the OWNER.
Driver: Yeah he's in the boot.

The cop radios into the station and his sarge turns up

Sarge : No licence sir?
Driver: Sure here, and pulls it out of his pocket.
Sarge : Not your car sir?
Driver: Course it is, and pulls out the logbook.
Sarge : Got a gun?
Driver: Nope.
Sarge : Can I look in the boot?
Driver: Pops the boot; there's no body in there.

Sarge : Well I was informed by the PC that you were driving a stolen car with no licence and the the owner who you had shot, was in the boot.

Driver: It's the PC he's a terrible liar. Bet you next he'll claim I was speeding.

Previous