The night air was cool on his skin.Jake staggered onto the sidewalk andtried to look as composed as possible.People were going home after anevening out. Could they sense hisguilt? He was certain they could.His heart thudded against his breastbone. He could feel their eyesburning into him, reading histhoughts, burrowing into his verysoul. He began to walk. He had towalk. He would have to keep walkinguntil they caught up with him. Hecaught a glance at his reflection inthe window of a parked truck. OhChrist, he still had her blood on hisface. Had they noticed it too? Hewiped it off with his sleeve cuff, andcontinued walking.

The neon lights of the diner beckonedto him and he swished through theirglass doors. He'd be safe here.Well, for a while at least. Heordered a coke and retreated to adimly lit table in the corner. Therewas a moth on the table. He reachedout a fist to flatten it, but withdrewand it escaped. He had done enoughfor one night. The old wireless wasfeebly belting out an old sixtiessong. It was nearly ten. There wouldbe a news bulletin then. Had theyfound her yet?

Grimly, he began to recall the wholesordid evening as he stared into hiscoke. She was a pretty little thing.Patsy. He said her name aloud. Thewaitress behind the counter gave him apuzzled look, then continued to flirtwith the truckers. Sweet little Patsyfrom the hardware store. His mom hadbeen more excited than him when hetold her they were going to the moviesthat evening. She ironed his bestshirt and smuggled some of pop'saftershave from the bathroom cabinet.

"I remember my first date." Pop hadsaid over his news journal. "I wasabout your age too Jake. We went to adrive-in and made out in the parkinglot." He chuckled, recalling his firsttime. "But she wasn't on the pill andI had to marry her." Jake grimaced.He was tired of Pop's anecdotes of howhe was an accident.

He didn't want to hear it, not tonightof all nights. "Your Pop's justteasing." Mom had soothed. "Now yougo out and enjoy yourself."Perhaps that was the reason why Jakehad left that night in a rage.Perhaps he wouldn't have done it if ithadn't been filling his head for thewhole evening. Perhaps if Patsy hadwanted it too. Patsy was beautiful.Every guy in school wanted to be herfirst. She was the only girl who haddeveloped breasts and, boy, did sheknow how to show them off! He pickedher up at seven, and almost came onthe spot when he saw her. She waswearing a skin tight, red velvet dressand no bra. He knew that because hecould see her tiny nipples poking intothe fabric. He felt a stirring in hisundershorts as his eyes drank in thelong sweep of her smooth girlish egsand her innocent rosebud lips, whichhad been painted with glossy redlipstick. Probably from her mom'smake-up box. He felt sure no motherwould allow their daug hter out lookinglike this! He was aware of thatvelvet dress throughout the wholemovie. Or rather, he was aware ofwhat was IN that dress throughout themovie. He wanted her, and she knewit.

"Let's go somewhere, Jake." She hadpurred after the movie. "Let's godown to the old storeroom and talk. Idon't have to be home until tenthirty." She had smiled knowingly athim. "I've always liked you, Jake.You're cute. Your arse is cute. Anyguy with a cute arse gets top marks inmy book."

So, he drove her in silence down tothe old abandoned warehouse, trying toignore the feelings his pants wereemitting. Trying to keep his handssteady on the wheel, ignoring the hotsweat on his brow.

"Keep your eyes on the road, Jakey oldguy!" He had told himself silently."Not long now." He thought crazily."Not long now."

The warehouse was dark and dusty."God, it's so hot in here." Patsy hadcommented when they were sitting onthe cluttered floor. She fanned herface with her hand. "Aren't you hotin that thick shirt, Jake?" He hadnoticed her eyelids had droopedsexily, and her voice had became ahusky whisper. He nodded nervously.So this was seduction. This was thething all the Oprah shows had ravedabout. And, sweet little Patsy fromthe hardware store knew how to do it!

"Why don't you take it off?" Shemurmured, wrapping one of her longfingers round a stray blond curl. "Ibet you'll feel better..."

"I thought you wanted to talk, Patsy!"He snapped, wrenching her hand fromhis face. "You said we could comehere to talk."

"Shit!" He thought. "I've blown itnow. Why don't I just do it? LookJakey, She's begging for it!"

He smiled humbly at her, but she waslooking at him strangely.

"They were right" she said. "Cindyand Prue were right. You are weird.Are you really gay, Jake?"

"What?" He couldn't believe what shehad just said, and then cold realitybegan to set in. It had been a set-up. A set-up to see if wimpy JakeO'Reilly was bent. He felt a warmrush rise up from his ankles to thetop of his head. He had to calm down.And he had to prove that Cindy andPrue didn't have a clue what they wereharping on about.

"It's alright, Jake." She laughedbitterly. "Lot's of guys in schoolare gay. Cindy and Prue said that 40%of the population are gay."

Cindy and Prue. Cindy and fuckingPrue. He yelled at her to shut thefuck up and her chest heaved in herdress. "Get your tits out", heordered her, relishing in the look ofsurprise which swept over her face.

"No!" She cried, crossing her arms infront of her. "Why do you want me todo that?"

"I think I've got a point to prove."He spat out, and, taking hold of herarms, he pressed her onto the floorand ripped the front of her dressaway. Now, Jake O'Reilly wasn't aviolent person, nor did he have a sex-crazed mind. But that night, in theold, abandoned warehouse, two newtraits were added to his personality.He had never seen real breasts before,let alone touched them. Patsy'sbreasts were pert and soft. Hegrasped one and squeezed. She yelpedin pain.

"Shut up!" He breathed quietly, "OrI'll slap you." She looked shocked andlay rigidly as his searching handscontinued their exploration.Cautiously, he bent his blond head andpressed his lips onto a hard, pinknipple. It reminded him of a frozenpea but tasted much better. Hethought he could hear Patsy moaningsoftly, but he didn't want her toenjoy it. He wanted her to sufferlike he'd suffered at high school. Hesank his teeth into the fragrantsoftness and his mouth welled up witha warm metallic richness. Patsyscreamed.

"What are you doing?" She screeched.

"What have you done?" He pushed herroughly back down into the dust.

"That's for making a noise." Hesnarled. "One more sound, and Iswear, I'll kill you." His wordsshocked him. What was he doing? Hisvoice didn't sound like his own, yethis undershorts were bulging with hisever-increasing erection. "I want tofuck you." He said calmly. "And I'mgoing to."

Ignoring her struggles, he hitched upher dress and delved his fingers intoher panties. It was warm and moist inthere and he liked it. She waswhimpering. "No. Don't. Pleasedon't. Please..." But he ignored heragain. He tore the wispy fabric awayand looked down at the soft triangleof sparse black hair. He could smellher faint musky odour and Christ, howbadly did he want to fuck that pussy!He held her down with one arm andbegan to tear at his jeans with theother. She was sobbing, begging himnot to do it, pleading that she was avirgin. "Don't hurt me..." She wept."Please, don't hurt me."

In a frenzy of rage he lifted his handand punched her on the cheek. Shescreamed. He done it again, thenagain, until she lay quietly, too weakto protest any further.

"That's better." He said softly,brushing her hair from her eyestenderly. "That's better, isn't it?"

"You're crazy." She sobbed. "I knewit all along."

"Oh, yeah?" He growled loudly. "Well,here's a little food for thought."

He snatched hold of his penis andstabbed it against her labia. Hemissed. "Fuck!" He cursed. "Keepfucking still. I can't get it in!" Hethrust forwards again and he felt thesoft folds of skin part a little andthen enfold his shaft. Jesus, it wastight. He had to move slowly or hewould have hurt himself. Patsy laythere drowsily, so he shook herharshly. He wanted her to feeleverything he was doing. After all,the first time is supposed to be amemorable experience. She realised hewas inside her and feebly tried topush him off. He was groaning, and hehad his eyes closed. A thin film ofsweat covered his face. He was havingthe time of his life. He growled ashe felt that familiar twinge deepinside his balls. "Oh God!" Hegasped. "I'm gonna co..." He explodedinside her and for a while, he justlay there on top of her, his breathslowly coming back to him.

"Patsy." He shoved her roughly. "Youon the pill?" She didn't move. Heshook harder. "Patsy?"

She stirred under him and shook herhead. "Oh, fuck!" He sighedbreathlessly. Then, with blindingreality, his father's words came backto him. "WE MADE OUT IN THE PARKINGLOT. SHE WASN'T ON THE PILL SO I HADTO MARRY HER."

"I can't marry you Patsy." He wasbabbling senselessly. "I'm going toHarvard. I don't want a kid. Oh,Patsy, Patsy. I know you'llunderstand... I know you will..." Shemoaned in pain, and a trickle of bloodseeped out on to her thighs. "Yes."He laughed. "I know you'llunderstand"

She gasped as his hands tightenedround her throat. Her body heaved andshe spluttered and kicked, trying toshake him off. She went weak, herhands still clutching at his, tearingat his skin, until, total oblivion.He dressed calmly and with one lastflourish, tugged down her dress andstraightened her brown hair. That'show Jake came to be staggering alongthe sidewalk after the 8pm movie.

He sighed and downed the last dregs ofhis coke. They'd be looking for himsoon. With a fleeting panic, herealised that he wanted to be with hisfamily for one last night.

His mom was in bed when he finallyrolled in at eleven, but Pop was stillreading his journal in his chair. Hefolded it neatly as Jake walked in andsmiling, took off his glasses.

"Well, son," He grinned knowingly."Did you take my advice?"

"Yes, Pop." Jake said quietly. "I'vefinally had my first time."

"Did you make sure she was on thepill?" He asked anxiously, observinghis son steadily for any signs ofdeception.

"Oh, yes Pop." Jake smiled softly tohimself. "Don't worry. I took careof that. Just as you told me to."

"That's my boy." And Mr. O'Reillywinked and went back to his journal.

END.